Tag Archives: positive vibes

Lessons We Learn From Spring

My birthday is on the cusp of this season of awakenings and rebirths, so naturally I wanted to share my thoughts on this season. There are many perks to Spring, not limited to:

  • well, my birthday, of course *straightens my Goddess leaf headpiece*
  • the smell of rain showers
  • unpredictable weather making every day an adventure
  • some goodies are in season, like spinach, kale, and asparagus
  • beautiful flowers are in bloom

With all of the obvious, tangible things that Spring brings, there are also deeper lessons we can all learn and appreciate from this beautiful, refreshing season.

The beauty after the storm:

Beautiful things happen after some of the darkest times, and just like the storms feeding the flowers, these dark times feed our need to persevere. There’s a calm clarity that comes after every depression I find myself slumped in (diagnosed BPD, but I think this can be related to those who aren’t mentally ill).

Patience is bitter but its fruits are sweet:

I’ve noticed that even with my own generation, there’s a need to do everything with speed. There’s a sort of desperation as though the very life is dependent on how quickly you can deliver, but taking time to put in the effort and make something beautiful produces a much better result than rushing through it blindly. In the age of instant-gratification, it’s a challenge, but nothing good ever came easy.

It’s never too late to turn a new leaf:

Each year the trees lose their leaves and in the spring they grow and become elegant once again. Why contain ourselves to seasons when we have every single day to start fresh? Every morning, you have the choice to start the day with a positive attitude, to be productive, to look at yourself in the mirror and recite affirmations. There will be bad days, but not every day needs to start with the fear that it’s going to be that way.

Nothing lasts forever:

Just as those bad days don’t last forever, neither do positive affirmations guarantee a perpetually happy mood. Embracing the highs and the lows for what they are, rather than resisting the latter, is much more beneficial. A study was done on embracing bad days, which stated that doing so makes it less likely for subjects to experience persistent negative emotions in following months.

In short, stop and smell the roses. Life moves at much too fast a pace to be on a constant grind. Enjoy yourself and take in the surroundings, play in the sunshine, splash in the puddles. Live life!

 

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I FAILED My Resolutions & That’s Ok!

I remember how stoked I was in December 2017 to set my goals for the following year (ahem, hi 2018). I thought they were achievable even though I made sure they were BIG. Go big or go home, right? But I also had a lot of secret goals that I didn’t want to share with everyone until I was close to achieving them (like shedding back and hip fat).

Imagine my absolute shock (sense the sarcasm) when I did NOT achieve all of my goals! Let me break it down for you (or you can go to my original post here).

These are the goals I WANTED to achieve:

  • Wear a bikini (with confidence) by swimming season
  • Improve form and posture
  • Two Macrobabe videos per week
  • Experiment with new recipes
  • SPREAD POSITIVITY

And theses are the goals I actually achieved:

  • Wear a bikini (with confidence) by swimming season
  • Improve form and posture
  • Two Macrobabe videos per week
  • Experiment with new recipes
  • SPREAD POSITIVITY (by a technicality)

At the time, I wanted to feel and look good, and I wanted to feel right in my skin. But my pain, which I thought was from pushing myself too hard and pulling muscles left and right, became chronic. It has caused me to slip into a very negative mindset, like a stick in the mud.

So no, I did not wear my bikini with confidence in myself (and I know there are people watching this blog who have called me fake and that I fake confidence, and I definitely have faked confidence, but if it gets me closer to the mindset I want, why is that a bad thing? At least I’m not faking friendships…). I wore a bikini and had a good time with friends (who, despite me leaving the friendship, and contrary to what they want to believe, I have no ill will towards lol).

I improved my form and posture, but it wasn’t from persistence in my workouts because I stopped working out with weights as much, and I decreased my cardio quite a bit. I ended up doing a lot more yoga and to this day still stretch twice a day. When I’m at my computer editing or watching TV or even eating a meal, I try to be mindful of my shoulders, back, and hips.

I absolutely failed in my macrobabe uploads. I know I harp on it, but my pain has felt like such a weight against me. Be forewarned though, I’m documenting my journey to getting a diagnosis and getting better, and it might get ranty and annoying!

On the plus, I did pretty amazing with my recipe experimenting. My family and I have tried a bunch of different types of food as a result of this goal. I couldn’t be happier! Recipes to come in this next year, hopefully (no promises, because let’s be honest, I am trash at commitment).

By a technicality, I spread some positivity. I felt as though I was a good influence for awhile and I’ve been determined to put on my positive pants, but I allowed an extremely toxic person in my life, who even though I was warned about, I wanted to believe I could be a positive influence to them. But it turned out they were like… a vampire, sucking all of my good vibes, telling me about how everyone else bad-mouthed me, and making me feel so isolated in a place that I thought I was welcomed. I allowed that to sit and poison me instead of reaching out to those other people for an explanation, to help fix the relationships with the others. Again, I’ve pushed through it, and though I don’t have any ill will towards any of them, I definitely intend on telling my story eventually and live my best life with all of them in the past.

By no means am I perfect, and I don’t pretend to be, but I’m still proud of the little that I accomplished. At the very least, I can say I’m a person who tries her hardest and has good intentions. I look forward to working on flaws and sharing my 2019 New Year’s Resolutions with all of you, even if resolutions are designed to fail.

I’ll see you all in the New Year. 2019, here we come!